Archive for December, 2010

This one’s for me

I’ve read in fantasy books about the ability to divide your mind into compartments so an enemy could never crack your free will. Doing this would lock up a couple of your key elements into a room, locked with only one key. And that key can not be found by the one trying to get secrets out.

Before today, there were days I wished some fantasy things could become reality. But now, if I could choose one and only one, I would choose for that ability.

It would be great to lock up my self respect so I could give in to the sadness. So I can just let myself go without the hurt that always follows.

I figured it couldn’t be true.
I would be too damn easy to find someone who could check off all boxes on the list I had made up in my mind.
But she does exist. and going on a pursuit without locking up the parts that define me would surely change me.

This one’s for you

While we talked I got that strange, warm feeling inside I’ve grown to love and hate.
The feeling that this young friendship could become more than just a friendship.
The strange, all overwhelming feeling that the smile your eyes just showed me was more then just a smile to laugh at that ridiculous joke I just made.

The feeling that you could be more to me than just a friend.
The feeling that made me wonder how the sweet touch of your lips on mine would feel, how it would taste, what I would smell, how the air would tremble at a different rate.
It got me hoping that there could be a change in karma.